Recommend This, Chopper

You can't believe how disheartened I am by one of my clients. She keeps wanting me to perform a miracle to get a dental provider to do work on her child before the provider is paid. The member has 2 insurnace coverages - the one from the employer and a state assistance program. The provider will not bill services when dealing with the assistance plan because things that are not covered tend to not get paid.
This woman is running through her entire financial plan for the month, talking about $1200 for the house payment at the beginning of the month and $1300 for bills throughout the month and I am feeling the air around me tense, the grip on my throat tighten, and the blood rush to my brain.
Not only can I not do or recommend what she is asking me to do and recommend but there's no way I would, even if hell has frozen into a sparkly, twinkling Ice Capades starring me and my imaginary friends, RJ and Mike the Dyke.
This woman has great insurance (trust me, I helped write the plan) and public aid and she is complaining to me about how she is going to pay $800 for her child's necessary dental work?
I'm trying super-hard to not be judgemental but it's rolling off of me like steam. I don't feel one bit sorry for this woman. I recognize that she doesn't have extra cash lying around and sympathize but she has a house, and a job, and a car and the fact that she can't find $800 because she and her husband "all maxed out" doesn't even tuch, let alone tug, any heartstring that I have for the lower-middle class.
Save up.
She tried to get me to recommend that she float a check to the provider and that in the meantime, the state would have the claim processed and the reimbursement ready to go to the member and there is no fucking way that I would even think about recommending a client to float a check.
This reminds me of another situation where a member called me (and I work in a BROKERAGE HOUSE) about getting a prescription for Paxil filled because her purse had been stolen. She was freaking the fuck out because BY LAW she would have to pay out-of-pocket for a replacement prescription. It was going to be like $80, as opposed to her insurance copay of $10. Sweetheart, I can't change the law. And I know how much you make. Where is your money? In my head, I made up a gigantic gambling problem for that lady.
This time, I am imagining a spending problem. For Christmas, they bought jet skis and they totally have digital cable, two SUVs, and a pantry full of name-brand sugary cereal. I obviously don't know if that's true and wouldn't voice these fantasies elsewhere because the fact is that you never truly know what's up in someone else's life. I'm sure these clients look at me and think that I am making bank and that since I am single, I have some cute, Trading-Spaces-bright little house and that on Friday's I go to the gym and then meet up with my 3 fantastic girlfriends at the Cactus Moon and we are all wearing some perfectly trendy cowgirl digs.
We all know that the truth is more like me coming home from work going over to Wild Oats to get a slice of pizza and a salad, turning on the TV and waiting for the cats to take over my lap and general vicinity.
I go to bed around 10 on Fridays.
Whoo hoo!
Tonight, I have to do laundry - things are at critical mass.
No, I don't know how I am going to do it with regard to the bike but let's just say that I am VERY happy that the laundry place is close to the a-p-t.

arizonasarah at 2:08 p.m.

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