2005-02-03
Tattoo You? No, Tattoo Me
I can't stop eating. It's like I am a human vacuum. I ate a WHOLE BOX of Snackwells' rip-off of Keebler Fudge Stripes. I mean, they are good but come on: A whole box? In two days?
And even though this monumental feat of eating Little Debbies and cookies and crapified crud is somewhat impressive, it's not doing a whole heck of a lot for my self-esteem.
I did finally go back to the mat last night.
For the first time in almost 2 whole months, I wnet back to yoga with a serious intention of re-committing to the practice of Anusara. It was pretty awesome. I'm totally sore and afraid that I won't remember how much I love asanas but it had to start somewhere.
A friend of mine is coming to visit this weekend and I'm going to drag him to a class on Sunday.
He's one of those people who thinks yoga is for stretching and that's about it.
Ha!
5 minute handstands are not, by any stretch (pun intended) of the imagination, a simple way to loosen up your muscles. You are using every fiber of all the muscles you can think of and then you figure out that you're also using some that you didn't think of.
I am not going to spell these correctly but I finally remembered
I'chee, Yanna, Crea
Attitude, Alignment, Action
or finally:
Idea, Arrangment, Manifestation.
Don't confuse Yanna with yoni. At least, don't say I didn't warn you to leave yoni out of this discussion.
I'm also hoping to get ink this weekend. I need my tattoo. I hae been waiting and waiting and waiting for the right time and now is that time. I'm doing an Ohm but I'm having the negative space around the symbol filled in so that the symbol itself is my skin showing through.
Ohm, to me, is a universal sound but it also represents salvation. Through yoga and Kirtan I have been able to find my own inner and out strengths and limits. I have learned to balance adult with child and exhaultation with excruciating pain. I've learned instant and deferred gratification. I've learned how to do really cool stuff with my body that impresses people who don;t think yoga is about anything more than stretching.
Finally, I've learned how to feel loved and that I can feel that for myself - some one person does not have to be pouring love into me. That feels good but it feels good to be my own love, my own salvation.
On another level, the tattoo is an expression of my acceptance of my physicality being part of the divine connection that we all have to God. A symbol of universal and collective harmonization toward a peaceful togetherness that is made up of my skin is a powerful representation to me of the Divine Flow that I feel so many times I am at yoga or Kirtan.
Hence, the tattoo that I hope to get this weekend. I just need to get ahold of the image and I'm hoping it gets emailed to me tonight!
I should get back to work. things are still shaking around here. I'm not 100% sure what is going on but I did a reality check with someone who witnessed one of my team members and I trying to work on a project. I asked if she thought I was being unreasonable and the immediate answer was, "No. There was no reason you got that response to your legitimate questions."
I think my team member has been complaining about me in a "But she works for me" way. The thing is, I don't work for her. I work on the same team as her. I have different responsibilities and I report to a manager, not to you. You can't complain about me the way you want to because I know what the bosses around here are going to say.
Plus, you know the drill.
You don't like the drill, but you know how things are supposed to be done.
I want to use the new rules and systems and be accountable for what I do.
You don't want me to do that but the way you're acting right now isn't helping anybody but me.
So.... for the moment, thanks for stomping around and acting all spoiled!
I'll be over here trying to do my job.
arizonasarah at 3:12 p.m.