I'm in Love

I am so in love.

I met the most perfect guy I have ever met in my not-so-short life. He is so cute and so smart and totally a liberal and he went to Berkley and he loves the beach and he says "Dude" a lot, just like me.
He is very sexy and I keep having to smack my hand away from him when I am in his near-proximity because I think it would be weird of me to touch him all the time, even if I am touching him in totally appropriate places.
He wears thrift store courderoy jackets and he has seen all the movies I want to see.
He was all worn out from the freak storm that rips through our neighborhood Saturday night and like me, would rather have talked on the phone than gone to do something.
Our neighborhood?
He owns a house in my ghetto. He doesn't have the ghetto-bird flying over like I do but he does have an ice cream truck looking for children at about 10 pm every night.
He's so pretty. And he's all defeated about the election still and he deletes his moveon.org emails, just like I do.
I am so in love that I don't particularly care whether he likes me back or not. I haven't felt like this over a boy in forever but I have butterflies EVERY TIME I think about him. I want to behave when I think about him and I want him to meet the kittens and I want him to kiss me when I arrive in his proximity.
I want to do a lot of things to him.

I want this to be real and organic and sexy and lasting.

I want to be in love with him and I want to tell any of my fears and insecurities to kiss my fat white ass and to get the fuck away from me; I don't need them anymore because I adore him and I didn't get any bad hunch and I didn't feel like he was temporary. I knew him when he walked in and dammit, I just want for him to know me, too.

I'm dizzy and high and hungry and not sleepy and I have no problem calling him when I say I'm going to call. I have no problem with how often he calls and no problem with the fact that we dodn't get to hang out Saturday night due to both of us being rained into our respective houses.

I'm fucking in love and I want to sing it all over this state and the next one over and most of all, mostly, mostly, mostly, I want for him to be singing like I am.
I want it to all fall into place with him because I don't think I've ever looked at someone and had him look back at me and feel like I was made to be right there with him at the very beginning of a very long time of loving in a quiet little house with a kid and the kittens and the dog.
I saw all of that with him and I am not afraid of it, which is great, and I believe that I could actually have that kind of partnership with someone who is a good man.

I mean a really, GOOD man.

This is so exciting.
I still have no idea if he is even into me.
Hell, he could be totally screwing someone or be being nice to me out of sympathy for all I know but I'm going all out in order to find out if he likes me back because over here, I am all ready for that type of mutual love situation.


arizonasarah at 12:07 p.m.

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