The Question of the Day

Why aren't people nicer, just... in general?
Is it really so hard to just be polite and to take responsibility for yourself?

Lately, I've realized that someone I was close to is kind of a jerk.
He just seems to be awfully picky about some things that are not very important.
And fake-bossy, kind of like a teenager, which is not exactly the most pleasant overall tone or carriage.
He also asks extremely inappropriate questions.
This used to be funny but then I realized he's too smart to be serious and quickly concluded that I can't hang.
I'm not into being patronized, ever.
"Is that her real ass?"

The disappointment no longer lingers.

Another jerky behavior involves the kitchenette, of course.
Either myself or Someone Else makes a pot in the morning.
I seem to always be the person making the second pot.
Someone Else gets her coffee and goes back to her desk, which is much more convenient to the kitchenette than mine, I might add.
I have to go half-way across the building to the kitchenette and when I get there, I often find that I am making the second pot of coffee even though most of the time, I made the first one, too.
How hard is it to make coffee?
We've been over this - it's not hard.
You open the pre-measured packet of coffee and dump it in the basket. If you want it to have flavor, you open a second packet and pour in about a third of it.
You press the button that says "brew."
That's it.
In the morning, it's only being considerate to make two pots of coffee.
You've made one because you want some coffee.
the second one is there, empty and waiting.
Your co-workers are in their cars and pulling into the parking lot.
Why not make coffee?
Why am I the only person on this side of the building who is considerate enough to do this?
Is it some weird stand-off on principal of "making coffee is not in my job description."
It's not in mine, either, just like many of the things I do like calling people to make sure everything came out okay or attending tearfully boring meetings where no food is served.
I'm sure your numerous smoke breaks aren't in your job description but there's no trouble with those, now is there?

Finally, how is the alcohol not a problem at this point?
It's worse than ever and it will kill you soon, or worse, it will make you a very sick and uncomfortable person.
Did you know I hardly listen because about half the time, I can't understand you?
There's so much slurring and then a bunch of nonsense and all I see is a melting brain, like a melting cartoon brain that comes alive by morphing into a real, smelling, emulsified brain.
Then I get angry because that's a waste on so many levels I can't even begin to start counting them.
But I know you know it's ruined your life and I know you know I think that's pathetic and week the way you think rehab is pathetic and weak.

This has gotten progressively worse over a very long time.
It's not going to change and I know that in a cleaner way.... like, you can hear something said to you over and over and over and over and you don't feel it until you FEEL it.
Maybe you don't know about love vs. sex until you FEEL it.
Or maybe you don't know about being better than what you think you want until you FEEL it.
You have to have a meal, I think, in order to taste the important things that people with better self-esteem tell you.

I FEEL like people should want to be more respectful, more purposefully considerate, and more courageous.
Why waste your life trying to patronize, knowingly creating extra work for others, and drowning in a jug of wine?
It's so fucking stupid to do those things.

arizonasarah at 10:18 a.m.

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