2009-10-06
It's an Exercise
I'm fine.
And being creative elsewhere... this blog is probably not going to be used any time soon.
It lasted for years and it was great but a few things have happened:
1. Facebook.
2. This is not and never ever was a diary. It's a writing exercise. When I write about something, be it an experience, a person, a feeling or a moment... that's all it is. Writing.
Anytime I really explore something in writing here, it seems to cause a lot of concern that isn't really warrented. I love so much how much people care about me and I get that expressing concern is an expression of humanity.
Everything I've written here is deliberately meant to elicit an emotional response. I choose words and structures and analogies that will have an effect. In other words, I exaggerate and emote a lot more than what is really going on in my life.
This blog is one years-long exercise in working on a writing voice but... over time, I've repeatedly run into this thing where people treat it as my diary.
And I appreciate the concern, I do with all my heart but it's actually caused weirdness in areas that I liked better unweird.
I love writing. I love thinking about how to chose words and voice so that there is an experience for the reader but I feel like here, the experience has gotten lost in the misunderstanding that this is a place where I pour my heart out.
Everything is true - every feeling, every fact, every everything I've written here has started as a kernel of reality. Then I take that foundational fact, feelng, or experience and try to make it have layers or volume that it doesn't necessarily have in my 3D life.
So, I'll be back, I will. If not here, somewhere.
And watch, I'll be back at it in two weeks right here.
But if I am, it's just writing, y'all.
Any essay or subject is a grain of salt of reality and then it's sliced and modge-podged, and painted, and ripped back off but taped somewhere else... it's writing.
arizonasarah at 2:02 p.m.